Lately, when I can't sleep, I've picked up the strange habit of watching TLC's My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. I'm utterly FASCINATED with this show, and I honestly cannot think of another culture that is more different than mine, than that of the Irish Traveler/ Romany Gypsies.
I honestly cannot believe that in 2012 there are young girls in modernized Europe who quit school at 11. ELEVEN! It also baffles me that there are girls who fully accept "their lot" to be nothing more than sex objects and people who "clean up after boys". A wedding is all they have to look forward to, a wedding... at 16 years of age, it makes no sense in my brain. I sit there looking at the television and thinking.. "This is fake. There's no way these people really feel this way. This is impossible."
So, let's look at a few things that your Big Fat Gypsy Millennials might be doing that you don't understand and what some of their motivation MIGHT be.
1. Getting out cell phones during meetings - In my most recent online survey, Hiring Millennials, 67 out of 82 (81%) of respondents born BEFORE 1982 said it bothers them when Millennials get their cell phones out during their meetings. There are two things you're potentially not thinking of, however. #1 most Millennials do not wear watches so the way they check the time is by looking at their cell phone. #2 Very few keep a paper calendar. Instead they prefer to keep one on their smart phone. So when you talk about an important date or deadline, they will get their cell phone out to put it in their calendar. When they pull it out they notice that they have emails too. "Maybe the email is work related", they think, so they decide to open their inbox. Then they see an email that isn't work related, or a text, or something funny, and since your meeting is so boring anyway, and already eating up 1/3 of their work week they end up completely distracted and playing "Words with Friends" and looking up occasionally to see if you're mad or not.
2. Leaving their used, dirty cup in the break-room sink - Two questions to ask yourself here. Question #1: Does this Millennial still live with their parents? #2 Are they the slob roommate in their apartment? If the answer to either of these is yes, then I would tell you that the reason they don't wash their dish is because "at home" they leave dishes in the sink and they magically get washed. Or, more likely, they don't put their dish in the sink, they put it in a dishwasher and run them all at the same time. So they are unlikely to wash out one single cup or dish, because they've been conditioned not to. If nobody is around to call them on it they're at least twice as likely to leave the dish and sneak out, and they're completely unfazed by your "we're not your mom" sign up there!
3. Revealing TMI (too much information) - Okay, lets think for a second. This is the generation that has gone on Facebook and Twitter most of their young adult lives and told people when they're taking a shower, going to school, and have a hangover. They tell everybody EVERYTHING. Then their friends COMMENT on it!! It's instant gratification that people care about them and what they're doing every day (This is also part of why they think they're so important). Millennials are also more likely to reveal shocking information, because, on these social media outlets, mundane information does not get as much attention as shocking information does. Thus TMI works to their advantage. So no, they don't realize how offensive it was to you to tell you how much they threw up yesterday while sitting at lunch. In their need to get attention from those around them (and everybody feels this need by the way) they have a tendency to over-share.
4. Blur the line between friend and boss. Most Millennials are heavily affected by what we call Social Penetration Theory. Essentially what this theory says is that as time goes on, and the relationship improves, you are expected to reveal more of yourself to others. So all it takes you revealing one personal thing, or venting to them about something else, for them to feel the relationship barrier has been "penetrated" and that you are now friends. In my most recent Millennial survey 70% of have "Friended" a boss or a teacher and over 47% of them consider their parents friends! Something to think about: If they are your "friends" on Facebook, and you're revealing personal information and thoughts, sharing pictures of your vacation and your family, etc., then YOU ARE MAKING THE FIRST MOVE IN SOCIAL PENETRATION and it makes them begin to feel like you really are friends. Even if you never comment on their page even once. This becomes a major issue when you need to correct them for turning in sloppy work or for coming in late, as they honestly believe that their "Friends" would not criticize or reprimand them. So my advice? Make it a policy to not accept friend request from your employees. If they're in your direct employ I wouldn't blur the line by letting them see so much of your life and explain to them why before you de-friend them to not make things awkward in the workplace.
5. No pride of ownership. Both Baby Boomers and GenX were both taught to have some level of "Pride of Ownership" in what they do. For example, if I'm walking into my building at the University, and I see a piece of trash on the ground, I pick it up and put it in the trash can. Not because I'm getting paid to, but I feel lik the campus looks indirectly reflects on me. If I've chosen to work in a junky, trash filled campus, then I must not be very good. because the best seek out the best, but many Millennials do not agree.
Let me give you some examples to the question "Once employed I don't think I should have to.. (check as many as apply)":
- empty an overflowing trashcan 22% said no
- pick up trash in the parking lot on the way to work 26% said no
- make coffee 17% said no
- go into work on the weekend 17% said no
- work more than 40 hours a week if I'm a salaried worker 11% said no
- donate to company charities 19% said no!
- take clients out to dinner and use my own money up front 33% said no (boy are they going to be mad!
Sure, there are a large amount here who are saying yes, and I'm super excited about that, but the fact that we have more than 10% of people coming into the workforce who don't believe they should have to do any of these tasks, tasks that show a lack of pride of ownership in many ways, so that is a little disconcerting.
So why do they think this way? Well...to be honest, they don't know any better. If you want these behaviors in your company you need to TEACH them to your new employees. Teach them why its valuable. The best way to teach them is not just with your mouth, but with your own actions. If you're the CEO and you never ever make coffee, and they want to/plan to be you, then they're going to act like you. Don't ask a Millennial to do any task you wouldn't do yourself. ESPECIALLY just because they're "young, and at the bottom, and that's just the way it is," because they don't buy that and they're likely to jump to another job as soon as one opens up (meaning $$ in training down the drain!). You've got to make the grass green for them here so that they're not constantly looking at the other side. That doesn't mean spoiling them, it means practicing what you preach.
So yes, Millennials ARE different. and to YOUR corporate culture maybe they're sort of like the Romany Gypsies, but that doesn't mean that they can't be understood.
One of the things I most often hear Millennials say is, "why do we always have to adjust to what the old people are doing. Why can't they adjust to us too" and in a way, they're right. They have the latest tools, they have the most energy, they've got the concepts you're not even being exposed to, so why are you silencing them in the years when they could be the most useful? Why are you squeezing the life out of them because they are young and haven't been flogged by the workforce as long as you have? Perhaps if both groups would look to come towards the middle a bit you would both benefit!
Good luck!
" We are all wanderers on this earth. Our hearts are full of wonder, and our souls are deep with dreams.”
― Gypsy Saying
So, let's look at a few things that your Big Fat Gypsy Millennials might be doing that you don't understand and what some of their motivation MIGHT be.
1. Getting out cell phones during meetings - In my most recent online survey, Hiring Millennials, 67 out of 82 (81%) of respondents born BEFORE 1982 said it bothers them when Millennials get their cell phones out during their meetings. There are two things you're potentially not thinking of, however. #1 most Millennials do not wear watches so the way they check the time is by looking at their cell phone. #2 Very few keep a paper calendar. Instead they prefer to keep one on their smart phone. So when you talk about an important date or deadline, they will get their cell phone out to put it in their calendar. When they pull it out they notice that they have emails too. "Maybe the email is work related", they think, so they decide to open their inbox. Then they see an email that isn't work related, or a text, or something funny, and since your meeting is so boring anyway, and already eating up 1/3 of their work week they end up completely distracted and playing "Words with Friends" and looking up occasionally to see if you're mad or not.
2. Leaving their used, dirty cup in the break-room sink - Two questions to ask yourself here. Question #1: Does this Millennial still live with their parents? #2 Are they the slob roommate in their apartment? If the answer to either of these is yes, then I would tell you that the reason they don't wash their dish is because "at home" they leave dishes in the sink and they magically get washed. Or, more likely, they don't put their dish in the sink, they put it in a dishwasher and run them all at the same time. So they are unlikely to wash out one single cup or dish, because they've been conditioned not to. If nobody is around to call them on it they're at least twice as likely to leave the dish and sneak out, and they're completely unfazed by your "we're not your mom" sign up there!
3. Revealing TMI (too much information) - Okay, lets think for a second. This is the generation that has gone on Facebook and Twitter most of their young adult lives and told people when they're taking a shower, going to school, and have a hangover. They tell everybody EVERYTHING. Then their friends COMMENT on it!! It's instant gratification that people care about them and what they're doing every day (This is also part of why they think they're so important). Millennials are also more likely to reveal shocking information, because, on these social media outlets, mundane information does not get as much attention as shocking information does. Thus TMI works to their advantage. So no, they don't realize how offensive it was to you to tell you how much they threw up yesterday while sitting at lunch. In their need to get attention from those around them (and everybody feels this need by the way) they have a tendency to over-share.
4. Blur the line between friend and boss. Most Millennials are heavily affected by what we call Social Penetration Theory. Essentially what this theory says is that as time goes on, and the relationship improves, you are expected to reveal more of yourself to others. So all it takes you revealing one personal thing, or venting to them about something else, for them to feel the relationship barrier has been "penetrated" and that you are now friends. In my most recent Millennial survey 70% of have "Friended" a boss or a teacher and over 47% of them consider their parents friends! Something to think about: If they are your "friends" on Facebook, and you're revealing personal information and thoughts, sharing pictures of your vacation and your family, etc., then YOU ARE MAKING THE FIRST MOVE IN SOCIAL PENETRATION and it makes them begin to feel like you really are friends. Even if you never comment on their page even once. This becomes a major issue when you need to correct them for turning in sloppy work or for coming in late, as they honestly believe that their "Friends" would not criticize or reprimand them. So my advice? Make it a policy to not accept friend request from your employees. If they're in your direct employ I wouldn't blur the line by letting them see so much of your life and explain to them why before you de-friend them to not make things awkward in the workplace.
5. No pride of ownership. Both Baby Boomers and GenX were both taught to have some level of "Pride of Ownership" in what they do. For example, if I'm walking into my building at the University, and I see a piece of trash on the ground, I pick it up and put it in the trash can. Not because I'm getting paid to, but I feel lik the campus looks indirectly reflects on me. If I've chosen to work in a junky, trash filled campus, then I must not be very good. because the best seek out the best, but many Millennials do not agree.
Let me give you some examples to the question "Once employed I don't think I should have to.. (check as many as apply)":
- empty an overflowing trashcan 22% said no
- pick up trash in the parking lot on the way to work 26% said no
- make coffee 17% said no
- go into work on the weekend 17% said no
- work more than 40 hours a week if I'm a salaried worker 11% said no
- donate to company charities 19% said no!
- take clients out to dinner and use my own money up front 33% said no (boy are they going to be mad!
Sure, there are a large amount here who are saying yes, and I'm super excited about that, but the fact that we have more than 10% of people coming into the workforce who don't believe they should have to do any of these tasks, tasks that show a lack of pride of ownership in many ways, so that is a little disconcerting.
So why do they think this way? Well...to be honest, they don't know any better. If you want these behaviors in your company you need to TEACH them to your new employees. Teach them why its valuable. The best way to teach them is not just with your mouth, but with your own actions. If you're the CEO and you never ever make coffee, and they want to/plan to be you, then they're going to act like you. Don't ask a Millennial to do any task you wouldn't do yourself. ESPECIALLY just because they're "young, and at the bottom, and that's just the way it is," because they don't buy that and they're likely to jump to another job as soon as one opens up (meaning $$ in training down the drain!). You've got to make the grass green for them here so that they're not constantly looking at the other side. That doesn't mean spoiling them, it means practicing what you preach.
So yes, Millennials ARE different. and to YOUR corporate culture maybe they're sort of like the Romany Gypsies, but that doesn't mean that they can't be understood.
One of the things I most often hear Millennials say is, "why do we always have to adjust to what the old people are doing. Why can't they adjust to us too" and in a way, they're right. They have the latest tools, they have the most energy, they've got the concepts you're not even being exposed to, so why are you silencing them in the years when they could be the most useful? Why are you squeezing the life out of them because they are young and haven't been flogged by the workforce as long as you have? Perhaps if both groups would look to come towards the middle a bit you would both benefit!
Good luck!
" We are all wanderers on this earth. Our hearts are full of wonder, and our souls are deep with dreams.”
― Gypsy Saying
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